Am I even Funny? (And other Concerns)

If you read this post then you know that I was reading Mindy Kaling's book, Is Everyone Hanging Out 
Without Me? (And Other Concerns). Well, I finished it and it was...well, (If you watch How I Met Your Mother then imagine what I'm about to say next in Barney's voice) TOTALLY AWESOME! Anyway, it kind of got my creative/funny juices flowing and inspired me to write my own version of Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? Hence the title of this post. While it got me all inspired to narcissistically share with you all the life story of a young vaguely strange Guatemalan living in Utah it also got me wondering if I could even do it. I mean, I know I could totally write it all out, what I was wondering was if it would even be funny like I intend it to be. I mean, am I even funny? I like to think I am. Well, at least my friends tell me I'm vaguely humorous. If you've ever watched Emma, starring Gwyneth Paltrow, then you will understand why that last statement is funny. If you haven't then you will just read it without finding it at all humorous and move on...well, actually...what the heck? Why haven't you seen it, and what are you still doing reading this post? Stop reading and go watch it now. It's on Netflix! Actually, don't stop reading. Finish reading this whole post and then go watch a movie that will move you into falling in love with an older British male.

{F21: skirt similar, basic tank similar; Tanger Outlets: sunnies similar; Hat: borrowed from my sister; Sandals: Guatemala }

Anyway, back on point. For the next couple of blog posts I will be sharing with you all my life as I have seen it, with hopefully humorous and awe inspiring undertones that will make you all wish you were currently a 21 year old Guatemalan girl living in Utah blogging about the clothes she puts on her back and her semi interesting opinions. ;) Oh and I actually lied. This little venture of mine will probably not take a mere few blog posts. Why? If you've ever received a text from me then you already know the answer to this, but for the majority of you the answer is this: everything I say, whether it is said or written, is wordy to the EXTREME. I ramble and babble a lot. Example: if you ask me what I had for lunch I will proceed to tell you a ten minute story about everything that was going on around me and every tiny emotion I felt as I ate said lunch before I tell you what I actually had. -Insert French accent- I am told dees ees a habit most females have, no? Anyway, now you are prepped and ready for the blog posts to come. If you have little to no interest in hearing the tale of how a heroic tiny foreign brown girl living in a state most people wrongly associate with polygamy got to be a weird little fashion blogger then you can simply ignore the massive quantities of text you will see and simply look at and hopefully be inspired by the outfit I so coyly dressed myself in for the day. I will not be offended. Probably. Plus, the only way I'll have of knowing if you did or didn't read my life story told in broken up posts is if you comment with something like, "nice shoes". Which I will then proceed to answer with an "aww thanks" that will be genuinely heartfelt but still probably slightly hurt that you didn't actually read my riveting life story. ;)

Much Love!

Linking up with: The Pleated Poppy

Whatever Happened To?

Hello friends! How art all of you? Here in Utah today is day in which we Utahns celebrate a little holiday we like to call Pioneer Day. The point of the holiday is to remember and celebrate the pioneers who settled the state. For a lot of Utahns the significance comes from remembering their pioneer ancestors. However, since I'm an immigrant I don't have any pioneer ancestors to celebrate, BUT my family and I have come to the consensus that as immigrants our family basically qualifies as modern day pioneers for our future generations to come. With that in mind, we decided to make Pioneer Day a day all about us...so we take the liberty of celebrating ourselves! We treat ourselves to a day of going out to the movies, eating any junk food our little hearts desire and just all around basking in and celebrating each others pioneer glory!

{Target: skirt; H&M: booties similar, hat; Top: old, similar}

This morning I saw an outfit similar to the one I'm wearing on Free People's Pinterest feed and decided I had to replicate it because, um, if Free People did it it's obviously an awesome look right? ;) Anyway, last week I got to having a bunch of "whatever happened to" thoughts and it got me thinking that it'd be nice to share them here so let's make a bullet list! You all know how fond I am of lists! 

Whatever Happened To...

• Lady Gaga? My sister and I recently got to discussing Lady Gaga's apparent disappearance. I mean, whatever happened to her? One minute she was wearing meat dresses and singing about being "born this way" and the next...WHAMMO...shes gone! Not that I'm complaining or anything, I've never really been a big fan of hers, but still...eerie. 
• Passing notes instead of texting? I mean, I know phones and texting kind of rendered notes obsolete but I miss notes, they were so nice. A note was heartfelt, it took time to write out in perfectly adorable teenage script and I mean, it used to take some serious risk to pass a note back in the day. I mean, heaven forbid your teacher caught you passing notes and then proceeded to read aloud to the class about your undying love for McHottie. Notes for me died sometime around sophomore year in high school. Which, you know, considering how cell phones really took off for teenagers sometime when I was in the 8th grade it's pretty impressive that notes where able to hang on for that long. The reason I even got to thinking about this is because I found an old note I had gotten from my best friend when I was 15. It was adorable. We talked about the then "man of my dreams" code name, Frosted Flakes.
• Asking a girl on a DATE rather than asking her to HANG OUT? Maybe to some this one will seem kind of pointless. I bet some of you are wondering is there even a difference between the two? There is. The difference is that guys have started calling dates "hang outs" to make it seem less official, less real, less committed. It's mega annoying, let's just be real. If you want to spend an hour+ of time with me than just gussy up and call it a DATE. I "hang out" with a friend, not with someone I'm romantically interested in spending time with. Maybe I'm alone in this one, but that's how I see it. 
• Labeling things? This one is kind of in line with the last one and I mean it solely in the terms of relationships because labels like "geek" or "nerd" aren't necessarily good. Anyhow, it's kind of frustrating how so many people seem so averse to labeling their relationships. If you're exclusively dating a person then again just gussy up and put the boyfriend or girlfriend label on the sucker. It saves confusion, heartache and time. Is it really so bad to DTR? I mean, labels are good. Humans thrive on labels. How would the world function without 'enter' and 'exit' labels on doors, or the 'women' and 'men' labels on bathroom entrances. Labels give us direction, and clarity. If you're sure about the person then DTR and walk on through the 'enter' doorway, if you're not sure about DTRing then it's probably for a reason and it'd probably best to proceed through the 'exit' doorway. Again, not everyone is going to agree with me on this one but it's just kinda how I feel, plus there's a reason we all hate "500 Days of Summer" anyway. Nobody can stand it that Zooey Deschanel's stupid character, Summer, won't DTR with poor adorable Tom. Which, if we really get down to analyzing the movie it kind of goes along with what I was saying. Why didn't Summer label her relationship with Tom? Because she didn't love him, she wasn't sure about him so she should have just saved Tom the heartache and stopped seeing him after the first couple of dates. 
• Non automatic toilets, sinks, and paper towel dispensers? I know I already dedicated practically a whole post to this one here but I seriously hate automatic bathrooms SO much that I had to say it again. Plus, I just needed a fifth bullet. I like making all of my lists in groups of five. Why? If it's not a list of five it freaks me out, and a list of five is lucky because five is my lucky number. 

Much Love!

Linking up with: Fashion and Beauty Finds

Lists? Lists are Good.

I'm reading Mindy Kaling's book, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (and Other Concerns). It's pretty much pee your pants hilarious, but I mean this is Mindy we're talking about here so obviously it's ridiculously fun. Don't know who Mindy is? Shame on you. Go Google her now and read her entire Wikepedia description. If that isn't enough to convince you that she's awesome go watch an episode of "The Mindy Project". You will die of laughter and then come back from the dead just so you can watch the next episode. Not even kidding. Why am I sharing this with you? I think you should totally read it and bask in its hilarity, but mostly I'm sharing this information because, eh, I can't really think of anything else to say. I guess it's just one of those completely blank mind kind of days. Alright, to help with my blank mindedness how about we make a list? Lists are good. Alright, before we start I just made a random connection! You know that little minion in Disney's Hercules that says, "If? If is good." Well, that "List? Lists are good" that I just said totally reminded me of that so go back and re-read that line in the voice of that little minion!

{Ross: studded peter pan collar top similar here and here; Target: boyfriend jeans, wallet; H&M: pink wedges similar; F21: earrings borrowed from my baby sister}

Onto the list! What is passing through my mind right. This. Second.

1. I'm watching Admission right now. You know, that rom-com with Tina Fey and Paul Rudd? I'm like 15 minutes in and I'm already totally heart melting like warm butter down hot toast over Paul Rudd's adorable smile! Sigh. He's gotten cuter with age. I mean, he was totally baby puppy cute in Clueless but now he's lost the awkwardness that came with wearing the 90's male version of mom jeans. Eep! Just watched a scene in which Tina Fey goes in for a cheek kiss and accidentally ends up VERY awkwardly smacking her mouth into Paul's open mouth. Ha, hilariously awkward! 
2. I'm in the process of getting a new mattress so I've been sleeping on the couch. I've never been one to give a crud about sleeping comfort. I know. I'm weird. I just have never really been a big fan of sleeping. If I could do without it, I totally would. Anyway, with that said, I never thought that I would miss a bed so much. Couches are not comfortable. I don't know how my sister slept on a couch for almost two years. She's a beast. 
3. I may or may not have fantasized about future engagement and wedding photos last night. We've all done it before right? Right? Ok, maybe it's just me then. Call me crazy but I fantasize more about the engagement and wedding PHOTOS than the actual engagement or wedding. I totally know where (a green field up in the mountains of Utah or a totally colorful meadow) I would want to take them and I can totally already envision how I'd pose and everything. Crazy seeing as I'm single, but I mean what kind of girl would I be if I didn't occasionally imagine these things. It's completely healthy. Completely. Plus, this was a may or may not have situation here so you guys can't be sure whether I did or didn't. ;)
4. Mint and pink? New favorite color combo. Is it vain to say I totally loved my own outfit? 
5. My puppy sucks at being my male model. He refused to cuddle, stand still, do anything remotely adorable, or even face the camera, that is why you are all being flattered with images of his butt. You love it. ;)

Well, that's my list for ya. Hope I didn't bore you all to death.

Much Love!

Linking up with: The Pleated Poppy

I Hold These Truths to be Self Evident (In other words, my Declarationof Independence?)

So we all know that wonderful little document that goes something along the lines of, "We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal", and so on and so forth. Anyone know what I'm talking about here? That's right, I'm talking about The Declaration of Independence. Now, before you freak out that I'm about to give you a history lesson I might as well inform you that I'm simply putting together my own little "Declaration of Independence" of sorts for the day. It goes as follows, drum roll please...

"These truths I hold to be self evident, that my butt is in more pain than a Taylor Swift break up song, that I was endowed by my creator with a plethora of remarkable talents and abilities (had to toot my own horn a bit as the statement that follows is the exact opposite of self horn tooting) but was also endowed with certain (3 for the purpose of this declaration to be exact) undeniable faults, that among these are a complete inability to turn off any lights and/or curling irons when I exit a room, wash any sort of dish and actually make it clean, or put the toilet paper roll facing the right direction." 

{F21: black scoop neck tee similar; AE: striped button up similar; H&M: skirt similar, heels; Target: wristlet bag borrowed from my sister}

Let's discuss the items on my declaration shall we? 

Number One: MY. BUTT. IS. SORE. You know how people pound the bloody heck out of their steaks with little hammers to tenderize them? Yeah, how I imagine those poor little pounded steaks to feel after being "tenderized" is how my butt feels right now. My poor little tenderized butt. Sitting here writing this post is hurting my sore little cheeks so much that I kind of feel like drop kicking bunnies. Not really, but you get the picture. I hurt. Yes, I realize that the level of soreness in my buttocks (buttocks is a lovely word, don't you think? So beautifully hilarious.) is a direct result of my own crazy obsession with running and cross training but I reserve the right to complain about it gosh dang it! ;) 

Number Two: I find myself completely unable to remember to turn off lights when I exit a room and even worse turn off curling or flat irons when I'm done using them. I don't know what it is. Maybe I'm just a genetic mutant and I'm missing that genetic component in the brain that reminds people to turn off electric items, especially the kind that run the risk of over heating and setting  houses on fire. I think I forget to turn off lights because my brain will swear to its death that it succeeded in getting my fingers to flick the switch. That is until my annoyed siblings lead me back into the room where the light is inevitably still on. I've disfigured my bathroom countertop so much by leaving hair irons on that my adorable little sister stuck a note to our mirror that says, "turn off the iron"! It has helped.

Number Three: My total and complete inability to wash dishes. I don't know why but I just really, really suck at washing dishes and it's not for lack of trying because believe you me, I try. No matter how hard I scrub there always seems to be a spot, or multiple, that I seem to have missed. My dear old mum will frequently look through piles of dishes that I've washed and wonder if I washed them with my eyes closed. It's that bad. It's like I'm Oscar the Grouch's and Joe Dirt's secret love child and I learned how to wash dishes from them. I think I'll just have to be the type of lady who hand washes dishes AND puts them through the dish washer. Why not JUST put them through the dish washer you ask? Because I was raised to believe that dish washers suck at cleaning dishes and really only accomplish the unwanted goal of staining them. 

Number Four: I think the following images will accurately sum up number four. 

The CORRECT (at least according to my siblings and the rest of the free world apparently since this meme was even made.) way of putting the toilet paper roll on. 

The INcorrect way of placing a toilet paper roll

Heedless fool with a skewed perception of reality? I think that describes my personality pretty accurately. :) 

Much Love! 

Linking up with: Because Shanna Said So

25 Things Girls Say...and Oh Mickey You're so Fine!

Top of the mornin' to yeh lovely readers. Although, I guess it's not really morning anymore. Oh, well! So Buzzfeed compiled a list of 25 of our "best" phrases as the female species. The list is pretty hilarious and I know its meant to poke fun at the insane things girls say but I figure, "hey, if we're going to bleed and feel like we've got an alien tearing its way out of us a la Prometheus for about 5 days a month AND we have to carry the responsibility of birthing other little humans than we reserve the right to say crazy things. If we want to say, "guuuuys!", "could you do me a huge favor?", "my feet hurt", or "I kind of want a hot dog" then we bloody well should be able to! Not that I condone "I am woman. Me bear children. Me do whatever me wants" type of behavior either. I mean, just because we carry the future generations of the world on our shoulders doesn't mean we get an automatic free pass to be little whiny beasties. ;) I''m totally feeling number 7 on the list of 25 things girls say, though! Take a look fer yerselves! 

{Gap: jeans similar; F21: sandals similar; Mickey Mouse Tee: inherited from my little brother; Watch: borrowed from my little brother}

I don't know about you guys but I'm SOOOO over summer. I'm sick of the nasty nasty heat heat. Yes, the heat is so nasty that describing it required going back to 3 year old talk and saying it twice. I'm sick of wearing sandals that make the soles of my feet look so black that I might as well have been walking around bare foot. I'm sick of being constantly sweaty, and I'm sick of burning my butt every time I sit down in a car. I know, I know, I blogged so much about how excited I was for summer but then life happened and this summer just ended up sucking a lil bit. Ja feel? Plus, I'm just sooooo excited for fall, no matter how cliche girl that makes me sound! I ordered two pairs of booties from Go Jane and I'm literally dying to wear the crap out of them!! Plus, I just got two pairs of jeans from gap ($13 and $19!!!) that are just amaze-balls and look perfect with the aforementioned booties!! Fall, oh favorite season of mine, come quickly!! How are you guys feeling about the summer? Oh, and on a side note, who needs thrifting when you've got a little brother? I stole this mickey tee, from his 8 year old days, cut the sleeves and the collar off and voila cool new graphic tee for free! 

Much Love! 

Linking up with: Because Shanna Said So