A Curly Haired Girl's Guide to Survival

You know that saying that hair is a woman's glory? This statement isn't more true than for a curly haired girl. Most of us curly haired girls have spent so many years getting to know the ins and outs of managing our unpredictable hair (with more than a tear or two shed) that we've kind of become our hair. Screw that whole "one with the world" thing. We're one with our hair. My feelings toward my curls have been a roller coaster ride over the years. I've loved it, hated it, wished it would just be "normal", gotten into fights with it, cried over it, felt sorry that I ever hated it, and fallen in love with it all over again. I think it's safe to compare my hair to a relationship with a stubborn unmanageable man that never listens to me. When I was a kid I loved my curls. Mostly because when I was a kid having curly hair was cool and adorable. I mean, who doesn't love a kid with curls? Hallelujah Shirly Temple! I loved the attention and praise my curls got me. Then of course, puberty happened and it all went to shuck. (Don't know what shuck is? It's pretty self explanatory but see my "isms" tab.) All of the other girls had perfectly shiny smooth straight hair while I had this giant mass of curls that always got stuck to stuff and probably weighed more than the rest of my 12 year old little body. I hated it. I hated sticking out like a sore thumb because my hair was drier than the Sahara and bigger than a badonkadonk. Even though my parents had striven to build up my self confidence about my hair over the years it was no use. Like every other wee little pre-teen I just wanted so badly to fit in and look like all of the other "hot" girls. I'd always BEG my parents to let me straighten it. Rightly, they never did. I'd always shut myself up in the bathroom and wonder if I wished hard enough if my hair would turn straight. Thank you fairy godmother for not actually existing!

When I turned 15 my parents finally decided to lift the iron curtain of the "no heat" rule. I went a little heat crazy. I mean, I took it slowly at first. I started out just curling it a couple of days a week with a wide curling iron for smoother looser curls. I'd basically curl it how it's curled in these photos. Then it turned into an everyday thing. Then, I finally took the leap and full on straightened it. I hated it. So much. I thought it looked awful and that was the moment I realized that I didn't hate my hair. I liked my hair. No, more than that I LOVED my hair. My hair was what made me...well, me. Without my curls I was just like all of the other girls. I wasn't unique anymore. Who cared if everyone thought my hair looked "puffy", or if all of the other girls spent half an hour everyday straightening their hair. Allexis without curls wasn't Allexis at all. I am now, one with my curls. We're buds. I love them, and feel sorry that I ever hated them and abused them with years of heat. 

{Wilson's Leather: leather jacket similar only $15!; F21: graphic tee from a thousand years ago cute options here and here, shorts similar; Steve Madden: sandals similar; h&m: earring with earcuff similar} 

Now, onto my "Guide to Survival" for curly hair which was inspired by a list I saw on buzzfeed. Which, speaking of buzzfeed, take a moment to read this other list of curly hair problems. http://www.buzzfeed.com/erinlarosa/problems-only-people-with-curly-hair-will-understand It's pee your pants hilarious even if you don't have curly hair!!

A Curly Haired Girl's Guide to Survival

1. When people are fascinated by your hair and say the inevitable, "WOW, just look at your hair!" Keep the witty "yeah I've noticed...it's on my head", comment to yourself. After all, they mean well. 
2. People will never understand how it works. They will always see curly hair as being some strange alien technology so know this: Having curly hair basically qualifies you to be a scientist. Except that you didn't have to go to school for it. BOOM. Total win. 
3. People will ALWAYS want to touch and feel it. Take this in stride. It's just part of the job of being a curly haired mad scientist. Plus, if their fingers happen to get lost and stuck in the Bermuda Triangle that is curly hair...well, they can't say you didn't tell them not to run their fingers through it. ;) 
4. You've spent your entire childhood attempting to control it. My advice? Stop trying. There's no such thing as controlling curly hair. Learn to GUIDE it instead. Also, as a kid, when your loving mom attacks your head with a comb after every bath just know that she doesn't know any better and eventually both she and you will learn that curly hair isn't supposed to be combed. What about the hours of torture you've already suffered through with your mom you ask? Consider it mother/daughter bonding time. Texas Chainsaw style. 
5. People will talk about it as being, "frizzy, busy, dizzy". It'll hurt but its a lesson in self confidence that needs to be learned.
6. Getting a haircut will always be a nightmarish process. One, because its hard to trust someone with your curls and trust that they won't make you look like Big Bird. Two, because you will always get the inevitable, "Wow. This is a lot of hair. A LOT of hair. Cancel my next ten appointments! ...Did you know you have a lot of thick hair"? No, Sherlock. I've just been living with it my whole life but I didn't know. Thanks for breaking it to me. 
7. When you do find a stylist that can work with the curls, sing hallelujah and stick with that stylist as long as possible! 
8. The world will generally see curly hair as something to be fixed or improved upon. All those straightening shampoos and salon treatments? Ignore 'em. Your curly hair doesn't need to be fixed. And when you inevitably get asked the mother of all annoying curly hair questions...

          Just smile and wave. Smile and Wave.

    9.   Suffering through commercials targeting curly hair with non curly hair models never gets less annoying.

             

10. At the end of the day, though, just remember that the constant day to day battle is worth it because having curly hair makes you a bad a$* and you'll never need volume. Suck on them apples flat hair! ;) 

Much Love!

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