11.20.2013

It's Official

*The first portion of this post was written yesterday when I had just come out of surgery and was spacier than an astronaut.*
Wisdom teeth are officially out my friends! And its official, the universe hates me. Why you ask? Because of course the day of surgery mother nature had to come a knockin' with her monthly visit. Uggggggh. Cramps AND chipmunk cheeks? Joy. All things considered, though, I think I'm holding up pretty dang good. But then again, that could just be because I'm majorly whacked out on Scooby Snacks right now. Whoever thought it was a good idea to put a Nook into the hands of a blogger high on laughing gas was a genius. Oh, and quick side note, I got my wisdom teeth out as part of a research study so I'm going to be trapped in a little room for the next 10 hours or so, rating my pain and the effectiveness of their meds. I'd say their meds are pretty dang amazing but then again all I've had so far is laughing gas so I guess that doesn't really count. Want to hear all the nitty gritty details of my surgery? No? Well, you're gettin' 'em anyway because I need something to keep me occupied and I think reading the writings of my high as a kite self will be pretty funny tomorrow. Anyway, a group of kids and I showed up at the research center bright and early at 6am. I made sure to push maneuver my way to the front as soon as the doors opened because I wanted to be one of the first to get the surgery over with.
My maneuvering paid off because I was the second one to be operated on. When it was my turn, I headed into the operating room and just as I was about to lie down, the girl who had gone before me looked at me and gave me a small reassuring smile. What an angel. I wish I had been able to do the same for the unfortunate girl who went after me, but, ha, that so did not happen. Anyway, when I lied down, the surgeon's assistant asked me if I would like some laughing gas. Of course I wanted laughing gas, did she even need to ask? As it started to take effect all I could think was "why is this crap called happy/laughing gas? I'm not happy or laughing at all. I don't think it's working." About .5 seconds after that thought, though, it took its effect and I all but conked out. About 11 minutes after that I was all dooooone. Unlike the girl before me, though, I required help getting up and over to my waiting chair. I could barely keep my eyes open much less smile, so the poor girl that was supposed to go in after me got no reassurance. I did attempt a smile in her general direction, with my eyes closed, but when I opened my eyes to peek at her she looked terrified, so I'm convinced my half a$*ed attempt at a smile came out more like a horrific grimace. Poor girl. It probably didn't help boost her confidence that the nurses kept worriedly asking me if I was ok because I kept dizzyingly reeling in my chair.

I don't think they should give that much laughing gas to smaller humans because I literally felt on the verge of passing out. Anyway, after that, I was wheeled to my room downstairs and I couldn't have gotten a more annoying nurse to push my wheel chair. Whenever we passed anyone she felt it incumbent to announce, "she's VERY loopy". As if it wasn't embarrassing enough that I looked like a squirrel monkey, she had to go announcing to the world that I was loopy? Which, by the way, I was too close to loosing consciousness at that point to be loopy. Oh and then when we passed a few more people, more specifically a tolerably good looking male nurse, she felt the need to say, "she really likes her laughing gas." All I could think was, "Shut up. I do not. I haven't said two words to you this whole time so there's no way you can know if I'm "loopy" or if I "really" like my laughing gas. Which, by the way, I do. I want more."
 {Pacsun: oversize tee similar; Flying Monkey: wide leg jeans similar; h&m: star scarf borrowed from my little sister similar, wide brimmed hat; Charlotte Russe: heels similar}

Whelp, it's the day after surgery now and all things considered, I think I'm feeling pretty good. Pain is very minimal but I'd have to say my discomfort level is a little high. I feel nauseous to the extreme, but that could just be because I swallowed, what feels like, half a pint of my own blood yesterday and the little pain I do feel kind of feels akin to going through the teething process, funnily enough. My swelling isn't so bad and I think I did a pretty good job of hiding it in these photos if I do say so myself. :) Although, when I'm not trying to mask the swelling, this is pretty much an exact representation of what my face looks like.
"But I don't wanna kick the other kid's butts."

Much love!

P.S. for reasons unbeknownst to me these pictures turned fuzzy when I inserted them in the blog post. I couldn't figure out how to fix it, so there ya go. ;)

Linking up with: Unpredictable and Chic

2 comments:

  1. Love this post! I got an IV sedative for my wisdom tooth extraction and remember nothing from the time the drugs took over to two hours later! Hope you feel better soon!

    <3 Vicki
    wildeinthecity.blogspot.com

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